First Realizations
by liferegrets
Summary: As you stare at her sleeping face in the futon, you can’t help but regretfully realize, that your parents had not wished for revenge nor restoration nor pride, but happiness. Sasusaku.


A/N: Hello everyone! I'm here with a (kind of) new fic!

This one was posted on the Twinbells fanfiction contest and I wanted to share it with everyone, so if you think this fic left the computer screen and grabbed your heart, please vote for it in the contest! Love you all!

**First Realizations**

You are the heir of the Uchiha clan, your fate and your destiny were determined when you witnessed your parents on the ground, spilling fountains of blood; when your brethren's mouth curved sinisterly upward, when your mouth trembled, and your eyes widened.

The Uchiha Clan was no more.

It shriveled and collected dust when you left Konoha, when you left Naruto, when you left her.

Now you roam the streets again, sixteen years old and already accomplished with your life goal. The self-proclaimed forging of promises to your parent's graves were fiercely kept, and you walk down the dusty roads, without a purpose.

You want to keep your promise, although your parents didn't ask them of you. You strive for it anyway, because that is what Uchihas do. You wish to hold your head high when you walk the streets of Konoha, and that's why you pursued your revenge. Ironic though, in the end, it had made you do the entire opposite.

People point and stare at you as you pass by, some awed by your graceful stride, oblivious to your reputation as a traitor, and the rest sneer and glare at you, followed by mothers shooing their children off into homes.

Just as the Hyuugas are known for there graceful brilliance, you learn that the Uchiha, the supreme fan, is another symbol for pride.

* * *

You see her in the forests often, and you know she is there from the cracks in the earth that trail after her.

She has gotten stronger, yes, and she has certainly gotten more beautiful. You can't help but stay in that position in the tree, Amidst all of her lethal attacks, she has an attractive elegance, and you can't help but think that this isn't the first time you've stopped to stare at her.

You see her olive eyes, concentrating on the dead wood, and can't help wonder, where the little girl who had been trailing after you and Naruto during missions had gone. You notice her eyes had now lost its sparkle, and you see that it is replaced by a indeterminable weight, and you can't help but remember that: it was because of you.

Still, you cannot read her eyes, and later you will find that it was because she had lost something you never had.

You leave the tree branch with silence, with no detection of you that anyone would be able to infer that you were there. But at night, when insomnia finds you, you think of her, and etched into your dreams are those sad, emerald, eyes.

* * *

You feel her stare as you walk into Tsunade's office, and you can feel the distant longing emanating from them. You have a longing too, you feel, and you wish to go to her, and feel her soft hands in yours, but you can't, and your mind refuses to listen to your heart.

"S-Sasuke-kun…"

You wonder when things had gotten so difficult between her, and you don't have to turn to her to see that her face was pleading. You can feel her chakra approaching you, and you feel the walls suffocating you, but your heart stays defiant, and your feet are rooted in place.

You didn't know that you were holding your breath, and you feel it release when she touches your arm, so light that you didn't even feel it, but you knew it was there. You long to turn around, and grab her by the shoulders, and crush her lips to yours…

"Don't touch him, Sakura."

But you cannot.

You don't even have to turn to recognize her commanding voice, and you step away from her. You can already feel the absence of warmth on your arm, and you begin to long for her touch.

You feel her sadness radiating from her again, and you long to tell her something, anything.

You are weak.

You are strong.

You are beautiful.

I love you.

* * *

Nobody except her bothers to visit you anymore, and when the sun has barely risen, and dawn has engulfed the night, you know she is the one out in front of your door, waiting.

She's foolish, you think, because she is always waiting for you, for someone that would never come.

You don't have to peer out your door to know that she is there, and her persistence angers you.

"What do you want, Sakura?"

You watch as her small shoulders cower, and notice she is shivering. You want to take her by the arms and crush her to you, but you can't.

The law forbids you. The moment you stepped on Konoha soil, a sentence was placed on you, and you began understanding, that this sentence was worse than death.

_Uchiha Sasuke, you are the village outcast, you are forbidden to speak or touch the Konoha citizens under any circumstances…_

And as the heir of the Uchihas, you will abide by the laws. You, as the last living member of the Uchiha Clan, will bring honour to your fallen family.

So you continue to watch her shiver as she struggles for words, and you curse at her mentally for caring for a traitor who had betrayed his only friends for power.

"S-Sasuke-kun, I…"

You watch as she helplessly tries to stop her tears, and you find that keeping your façade is harder with the passing of each day. You stare down at her, and this time, you hesitantly bring your arms around her, reluctant.

Her soft breaths tingle your arms and bring shivers down your spine as your arms become firm as you grasp for her, for life. You lose yourself in her.

You sigh as the warmth and life flows into you, but you resist it, and push her away. You attempt successfully to ignore the hurt in her eyes as you turn your back on her.

"Go home, Sakura."

She's foolish, you think, because she is always waiting for you, for someone that would never come.

* * *

It's been weeks since you had last seen her. You go to the mountains often, to catch a glimpse of her, but find that she is not there. You think that she has given up on you now, and you want to reel relieved, but instead you feel hurt and betrayed.

You feel uneasy, also, because your chakra had gone so strong that you were able to detect her chakra from any distance in the village. But for the last few weeks, you find that any trace of chakra left in her has diminished, and you can't help yourself as you climb the stairs to Tsunade's office.

Your hands are hesitant, but you knock on the door anyway.

"Come in."

You enter the office, and find the hokage sitting in her chair, a mountain of paper juxtaposing her surroundings. She stares suspiciously at you, and you know from your observations of this woman with monstrous strength, that she is trying to remember if she had called for you.

"What do you want?"

You glare at her, unable to keep your anger and frustration bottled inside.

"Where's Sakura?"

She looks at you, dumbfounded.

"None of your business, nuke-nin Uchiha Sasuke."

You flinch as she emphasizes every syllable in that traitorous title.

"Tell me."

You eye her as she stands from her seat, her hands slamming on her desk.

"Why do you care about her? You certainly didn't when you left the village! You almost certainly didn't when Orochimaru commanded you to burn the village down!"

You can't help but feel the truth seep through your skin like ink on paper, and convincing yourself that you were under the curse seal gives you no remorse.

You leave her office.

* * *

You hear from a sudden visit from Kakashi that she is in the hospital; you know that the hokage, aside from her sudden outbursts, had taken pity on you.

You remember parts of his words, but cannot comprehend them, or rather refuse to.

…few more months…chakra exhaustion…coma…

A few days pass by, and you find yourself constantly arguing to yourself.

An epiphany wakes you from your thoughts, and you remember her eyes in the forest.

The doors in the Uchiha Estate open as you race out of them

* * *

You perform a brief reconnaissance of the area before you enter, and make sure all traces of Naruto's silhouette disappear before you step into the room.

You find her on the bed and see the long cords connected to her small frame, pumping chakra into her. Her pink hair forms a halo around her head, and amidst the stench of death and medicine, you realize, she has still been able to keep her beauty.

You try to ignore the brief emotion of relief when you see her chest heaving softly upwards and downwards in a repeating steady motion.

You find yourself entranced, again, much like in the forests, except you feel the emotions surging out into the visible forces of your face. You restrain yourself from touching her, and she remains to be the intangible barrier between your life of darkness and your life of purification and redemption.

You feel your heart with an unfamiliar emotion, one that had been appearing from moments with her, and you try to restrain yourself from taking her soft hands into your hard calloused ones.

You feel the longing, flowing through your veins and into your heart. You don't want to feel it, but you feel yourself give in to the yearning of your heart. You are the boy again, the boy who witnessed his family's murder at his feet, the boy deprived of all love in his later years, only to be replaced by years of revenge and hate.

You remember her to be the point in your life where the years of being consumed in darkness were ending, only to be replaced by years of warmth and love. You would rather die than admit it, but the days with Team 7 were the best in your life.

You silently, with casual grandeur, touch her forehead, and you flinch as she stirs after your touch. You want to take your hand away, but you feel frozen, once again planted to your spot.

She wakes, her eyelashes fluttering after your touch, and a surprised emerald meets shocked ebony. You hear her faint voice in your ears, but your body refuses to react, and your palm is still above her forehead. You slowly take your hand away, and your widened eyes return to their normal impassive ones.

You turn to leave, but you hear her mutter your name, and you can feel the confusion and sadness appearing on her face.

"I miss you, Sasuke-kun."

The words leave you paralyzed, and your shoulders stiffen, you can't seem to escape the tension in the atmosphere. You turn around, and you see the emerald eyes that you've been seeing at night for the last few months.

You walk hesitantly to her bedside, and you feel her gaze on your face, watching every move. She doesn't expect the warmth in her mouth, nor do you in yours, and both of you just savor the taste, the moment, and the memory.

"I miss you too. "

* * *

The next time you see her, she is under the raining cherry blossoms, and they swirl and dance around you as you approach her. It's been two weeks since you had seen her frail body in the hospital, and your eyes soften as she smiles quietly at the blossoms.

You can't help but hesitate as you walk towards her, and you watch as she senses your chakra, and turns toward your direction. Her eyes widen in surprise, and you see her unable to move.

You stand in front of her, towering over her strong yet fragile frame. An arm's length is what separates you from her, but you can still feel the intangible barrier.

"S-Sasuke-kun…?"

She watches you as your pale hand reaches up to cup her cheek, and the warmth of her cheeks penetrate through the bandages on your hand.

"Sakura."

You stare directly into her pools while she stares into yours, and your wavering questions and worries vanquish with the winds of the forest. The confidence surges through you like chakra before a battle, and with your other hand you cup her other cheek.

"Marry me."

You watch as her eyes widen, and a tear trickles down her face. She raises her hands to gently grab your hands on her cheeks, and she holds your hands in her soft ones. You watch and anticipate her answer, as each passing moment determines between a life of happiness and a life of indescribable weight and guilt.

"Thank you, Sasuke-kun."

You are aware of the law that you have broken, but as you watch the tears flow from her eyes from happiness, you do not care anymore. You find yourself, instead, tightening your grip on her hands.

You feel the confident warmth in your mouth again, and finally, you are able to return it.

Her brief ambivalence vanished by a simple, passionate kiss.

* * *

As you stare at her sleeping face in the futon, you can't help but regretfully realize, that your parents had not wished for revenge nor restoration nor pride…

…But happiness.

* * *

Sooo...how was it? 


End file.
